today, someone close to me said to me, "but i really respect that you're grounded in your faith." this disturbed me so much because she's supposed to have the same faith as me.. maybe i am too much sometimes. maybe i am too openly rigid about obeying Jesus. but this is my life. this is the promise i made all those years ago when i said i would follow him. it was an all or nothing decision then, just like it is now. god knows i still compromise.. i struggle all the time.. i still let other things have parts of me. he knows what goes on in my heart. and it's still so far from perfect.. so so far.. he knows. i know. i'm a hypocrite. i'm human. but my goal is to become like Jesus- a pure reflection. my heart's desire is to one day die and see him face to face and have him say, "well done, my good and faithful servant." and i'm trying, because he deserves nothing less than all of me.
i wish they could understand that. for themselves, not for me.
that life on earth is so short. so so short. that they shouldn't waste it.
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